Race day started for me with a 2:30am wake up call, rain hammering down on the roof of the caravan.  I wasn’t too unhappy with this as I’d planned on getting up at 3am having been in bed since 8pm, albeit struggling to sleep until about 10pm but the two days before that I’d been in bed early and slept later than normal and by Friday morning had been rested enough to be waking up before my alarm.

My prep began with a cup of strong coffee after abstaining from caffeine for 10 days prior to the race and a breakfast of Alpen and a banana before heading to the bathroom and having a really hot shower making sure the legs got special attention from the shower head to get them suitably warm for the day ahead. I then dried off and began to put my kit on, starting from the feet up I applied blister plasters to anywhere that I’d had a blister in the last 9 months of training.  As an extra precaution I added a good covering of BodyGlide between my toes and on my toenails (which I’d carefully trimmed during the week).  I put on my compression socks taking care to ensure that there were no creases or bumps that could rub during the day, followed by my compression calf guards. Next was the liberal application of BodyGlide to all areas on the body that might chafe (I’ll leave them to your imagination) then applying NipGuards and tape to my chest (which I’d shaved earlier in the week to ensure that the taping stayed stuck). I also bandaged my upper arms with crepe bandage as I’d found these chafed against my rucksack straps on longer runs while wearing my club vest. After this I put on my trisuit which is great for running because it has very few seams, can double up as an extra warm layer, can be stripped down to a vest layer in the heat and dries out very quickly after being wet.  I put on my club vest, my matching Rabobank cycling cap and tried on my backpack and belt kit for comfort before the obligatory pre-race selfie: 10370805_10152791600972962_6723565369084511337_n

I then filled up my water bladder, grabbed my belt bottles out of the fridge and packed all my kit into the car for the short drive into Filey to pick up the bus to the race start.

The West Car park in Filey is normally pitch black at 5am, but on this morning I could already see torchlight at the ticket machine and the interior lights from several cars.  I parked up and got out introducing myself to my neighbour who was brewing up having slept in the back of his car overnight.  It turned out to be a runner called Chris Lyons who I follow on Strava and we exchanged pleasantries about the still pouring down rain while I put on my trail shoes and dug out a torch to go feed the parking meter. Pretty soon the car park was full of people huddled together in small groups chatting about races they’d done, how training had gone and the usual runner banter.

When the bus arrived I quickly got myself upstairs wanting to get to the front, mainly so I could see how far along the road we were and begin mentally preparing as I popped a pro-plus to get my caffeine hit going properly.  I ended up sitting next to Nikki Carr and Phill Turton and talking poor Nikki’s head off on a caffeine and adrenaline fuelled hyper while Phill tried to sleep and prepare himself for the pain of finishing the Hardmoors Grand Slam on a very dodgy ITB.

The first thing that became apparent as the bus headed up onto the moors is that the weather wasn’t going to be kind, the rain had stopped but the fog rolled in. We arrived at Guisborough Rugby Club with about half an hour to spare before the race start.  I quickly got into the registration queue while others decided to pay a visit to the facilities or grab a last bite to eat.  Having handed in my drop bags and registered I spent about 15 minutes trying to put 4 holes big enough to get my event clips through in my race number.  That done and the number secured to my thigh I paid my own visit to the gents and eat a bag of crisps noisily while Race Director, Jon Steele went through the race brief including wherever possible lots of light hearted intimidation about how tough certain bits of the race were including a change to the ascent of Highcliff Nab from last years route from a fairly sedate climb to the summit to a frontal assault up the Tees Link and the fact that a fireworks display had been scheduled for 8:30pm in Scarborough to make sure there would be plenty of people in our way as we tried to run along the prom. After this we were ushered outside to the start line, I said goodbyes and good lucks to people I’d been chatting with and tried to find a bit of space.

Jon got his starting pistol out, counted down and pulled the trigger only to be met with silence, then after a second a chorus of catcalls and a shout of “Firing blanks again Jon?”. The second time the gun went off successfully and everyone started jogging up to the woods, as people passed me I got lots of comments and compliments on the handwritten slogans on my rucksack which helped my mood and confidence.

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As the road got a little steeper it seemed like a game of chicken was starting in which nobody wanted to be the first person to stop and walk, I just declared in my head “Sod it, the plan is to walk the uphills!” and stopped, it seemed pretty much at the same time as an entire group of others.  We all walked to the first stile and turn into the fields as a group then strung out as we got running again.  I had a first look at my Garmin to check my heart rate as my plan was to run between 130 and 145 bpm and found that the heart rate was a little high.  I put this down to race adrenaline for now and didn’t worry as I jogged along chatting to others in the group I was with.

As we turned left up onto the Tees Link we all realised how hard this initial ascent was going to be.  It was a 900 metres long, muddy slog up an average gradient of 18% my legs were burning and my heart rate was into the 165-175 bpm bracket that is normally only reserved for hard sprint efforts.  In short, not the sort of effort you want to be putting out in mile 2 of 62. Once at the top of the Nab we got onto a runnable section of the Cleveland Way that I was very familiar with and found myself running with Andrea Bowen.  We agreed to run together for company as long as our paces matched and chatted all the way to Saltburn which seemed to arrive in almost no time at all but the elapsed time was 2h:18m.  Andrea told me she was going to use the facilities at the Saltburn CP so I headed out alone and as I left the CP I decided to get out my phone and update my family via Facebook then put some music on.  While I was messing about with headphones, Andrea came jogging along so I stuffed the MP3 player and headphones into my bag and we jogged on together to the first tough set of steps on a coastline littered with tough sets of steps climbing up above the Ship Inn onto the looming cliffs where we both realised it was a lot colder than down at sea level and a lot bloody foggy.  As we jogged and walked along we both got more food into us and I pulled my arm warmers back up and was grateful for the fact I’d decided to throw on a Tech Tee between my trisuit and vest literally a minute or so before the race due to the cold at Guisborough.

As Skinningrove approached I decided to push on ahead a bit so that I could find somewhere for a comfort break, at this point dog walkers appeared out of nowhere on the beach and there seemed to be nowhere to hide so I waited for Andrea to pass, did what I needed to do then got going again and caught her up at another set of fearsome steps leading onto Hummersea Cliff.  Going up onto Hummersea Cliff I continued to be worried about my heart rate that had stayed above 160 bpm most of the way from Guisborough so I slowed my pace and decided to get it under control, sadly having to part company with Andrea who continued to run on into the mist strongly.

I stopped briefly to get some music on wondering if I’d be caught by the pair of runners I’d seen coming through Skinningrove as we’d reached the top of the steps but couldn’t see more than 30 metres or so behind me to get an estimate of where they were, neither could I hear any voices. As I pressed on at my new slower pace my heart rate showed no sign of slowing down and to make matters worse the path seemed to continue uphill making a sound judgment hard to make because of the effort.

I came to a fork in the path shrouded in fog and had a choice between a wide path and what looked like a very narrow track up into the heather, the wide path looked the most well travelled and appeared to go straight on but I couldn’t see any distance ahead to where Andrea must have run so I made a shocking decision and took a punt on the wide path, I ran slightly downhill for a bit before the path curved a sharp left and steep downhill, around about 800m in total before I knew for certain I’d picked the wrong fork.  I pulled out my route map, checked, mentally kicked myself all over the place and set off running back uphill.  Panic had totally set in now.  I had already been convinced that I was only about 5th from the back of the pack at Saltburn and was terrified that everyone would now have overtaken me, leaving me without the option of slowing down to pick up some company (even that of a sweeper) should I need it.  I pushed the pace hard along the track before eventually coming across some walkers who told me a group of runners had passed around a minute ago.  I surged on again for another few hundred metres until I started descending the cliff which I knew meant I was almost at Boulby where I came across more walkers who told me two runners were about 30 seconds ahead, the fact I couldn’t yet see them tells you all you need to know about the fog.  I eventually caught them at the first farm buildings in Boulby as we all descended out of the fog and into relatively clear but dull skies.

 

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I realised at this point I’d pushed way too hard and stopped to walk and talk briefly with them before they started off running again with me just slightly behind them.  As we got into Staithes we walked through the village together and proper introductions were made, I’d just met Jo Barrett and Dee Bouderba, who I both warned as we started to climb out of Staithes that I was likely to sing along to my music as I ran and not to be too disturbed by it. The climb out of Staithes was via a 400 metre stretch of field full of sheep dung at a 13% gradient, at just this point Gett Off by Prince cam on my MP3 so I tried to move along to the rhythm and dance my way to the top while guzzling down an energy gel, much to the amusement of the ramblers behind me. I jogged along tracking just behind Dee and Jo having clocked their HM55 finisher shirts making sure to take note which stretches ahead of me that they walked and which ones they attempted to run in order to warn me when to measure my efforts.

As I descended into Runswick Bay and the official 21 mile CP (but 22 for me after my detour) I was pleased to note my heart rate had sorted itself out which then left me with the dilemma of whether to actually drink the can of Red Bull I had waiting for me in my drop bag there.  When I arrived Dee and Jo were just leaving, I took the time to gt my bladder re-filled by the amazing marshalls, get some coke down my neck, bin unused items from my starting food bag and take on board the contents of my drop bag.  I also refilled the electrolyte mix on my belt kit then to the amazement of the marshalls plugged my Garmin (which was down to a single bar of battery power) into a portable charger.  I made a joke about whether I had time to make a Facebook status update before the tide came in then set off walking along the beach munching on a Snickers and guzzling a Red Bull before handing the can and wrapper to some Scouts who were cleaning litter on the beach. I arrived at the steps up from the beach to realise the steps actually run through the middle of the waterfall before becoming really steep steps.  Cursing I started up them slowly burping Red Bull taste back up and feeling the burn.

staithes kettle

At the top the caffeine began to kick in and I got a good run/walk/run rhythm going and made good progress watching Dee and Jo get closer and closer before I realised they were at the other side of a ravine and I had to track about 800m inland then another 400 metres back out before I would be anywhere near them.  I laughed at my mistake and began singing away to myself again.

As I came into Kettleness I thought I was seeing things.  I had discussed the possibility of hallucinations with a work colleague earlier in the week and as I was now seeing the Mystery Machine from Scooby Doo in front of me I thought this was it, I even went as far as going over to touch it to make sure it was in fact real and the product of some surfer type who was obviously a fan of the TV programme rather than a hallucination.

I got moving again and in all honesty the next 50 minutes were probably my best running of the day, my legs just seemed to pick up a new lease of life after realising that this wasn’t just a long training run after all and they were doing something different today, just a shame that it had taken them 6 hours or so to realise it.  When I got to Deepgrove Wyke I decided to descend the steps backwards to save my legs a bit, this seemed to ease the growing tiredness in my quads and the slight stinging pains around my knees. I pushed on hard into Sandsend and was greeted with the sight of Dee and Jo at the other side of the river having crossed the bridge.  I jogged until I was almost right behind them then decided to have a walk break while taking advantage of the fact I would probably have decent telephone reception to text Natalie with a progress update.  At the same time I decided to guzzle down two gels in one go from my bag and almost walked straight into one of the marshalls from Runswick Bay who had been driving past and stopped to check I was OK.  The combination of headphones, phone and eating made me realise I was everything I called some teenagers for so I mentally chastised myself and set off jogging up the hill towards Whitby Golf Club.

Despite hating every minute of running on concrete during training I was actually enjoying the run into Whitby along the clifftops, however that soon stopped as I descended the hairpin bends of Captain Cooks D’Huez (It’s a Strava cyclist thing) and got an evil sharp pain from my left ITB.  I hobbled down to the quayside then began running, weaving my way through the crowds of people walking 3 or 4 abreast and those who wandered into my path trying to read what the information on my race number on my thigh, I got seriously annoyed on the Swing Bridge as I had to cross into the road to find space to just walk and did a walk/trot past the chippy I had originally planned to buy food from before the race but now I had no desire for food at all.

As I reached the bottom of the 199 steps I could feel the pitying looks from the tourists burning into my back, one elderly woman coming down asked me how far I’d come and upon hearing that it was around 30 miles asked if I had to go up the steps instead of another way, I bit my lip and smiled.  When I was almost to the top I spotted a couple coming down, one of them had a Hardmoors logo on their top so I asked how far Saltwick Bay was and got the very welcome response of “Just about a mile”. I got going again at the clifftop, slightly disappointed that the ice cream man had given today a swerve (probably due to the weather) and jogged along to Saltwick trying not to aggravate the ITB on the slight descents and feeling very paranoid that I couldn’t see Dee and Jo further along the trail.

At the halfway CP I asked when Dee and Jo had passed through and found they were now 10 minutes ahead.  As I guzzled down more coke I digested this knowledge and felt slightly downhearted but on the upside the weather seemed to be fairing up.  Thanking the marshalls and patting my side pockets that I’d come to know as “Sweat and Slavery” because they contained my easy access munchies with sweets on the left and savoury on the right to make sure I hadn’t dropped them I tried to jog on but by the time I got to the old Whitby foghorn my left leg was on fire at the knee and i was also starting to feel a blister on my left little toe.  I joked with a couple of lady ramblers who’d just struggled over a stile ahead of me that they’d need to give me a hand getting over, they looked at me as if I was deranged then asked what I was doing, when I explained the look intensified further before they wished me luck and I was on my way jog/hobbling again.

As I got to Maw Wyke the demons really came to visit me and spent a lot of time in my head, this wasn’t the usual moments of self-doubt people have on a big challenge but something bordering on severe depression, voices in my head were telling me that I was stupid for even attempting this race, I had no hope of completing and that I should just stop, after all I was just a fat knacker who isn’t really that good at running anyway.  This continued for a while and compounded by the fact that I couldn’t descend as quickly as I had been earlier due to my knee problems, I was reluctant to run uphill and risk using too much energy and that there wasn’t much flat terrain to get any running done on.  I also could not see any sign of Robin Hoods Bay because of the local geography and I tried to get myself into a good place mentally by thinking of the people who’d wished me well in the days before.

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I eventually arrived in Robin Hoods Bay and was surprised that I had the urge to pee so I visited the public toilets before the CP and was horrified at how dehydrated I must have been to only have needed to go twice so far but also at how dark my urine was.  I had, up to Whitby been taking on the electrolyte mix regularly but it had begun to make my kidneys ache so I stopped using it as much and filled 2 of my belt bottles up with coke at Saltwick Bay. I arrived at the CP and was pleased to see Mike Booth who I’d met at Scarborough during the 110/160 in May who made me drink 3 cups of coke while filling my belt kit up with more coke.  I asked how far to Ravenscar, he smiled and told me it was 5 miles before seeing me off.

Descending further into Robin Hoods Bay was sheer agony on the knee and some drunks outside a pub offered the insight that I looked like I’d soiled myself. I smiled and waved and kept plodding downhill. Unsurprisingly at the other side of Robin Hoods Bay there were yet more steps but also a sign that said Ravenscar was only 3 miles, this lifted me, as did a mother and her son who both clapped me by on the footpath at the top of the steps.  I told them that they didn’t know how much that meant to me and got a proper run going on the nice flat path that led to Boggle Hole where I knew all kinds of Hell awaited me.

Descending the seemingly endless steps into Boggle Hole was pure torture, it felt like some evil soul was sawing at my left knee with a rusty hacksaw while injecting a cut with lemon juice, I kept catching my left little toe which was by now obviously carrying some kind of huge blister and the sun had come out making everything seem hotter than before, the arm warmers came down again as I tried not to sweat too much.  Climbing back up the other side of Boggle Hole just felt awful, I couldn’t even marvel at the beauty of the place because I was almost on my hands and knees at times.  Eventually I got to the top but it felt like I’d scaled Everest but only with the knowledge that after a short jog I would have to repeat the process at Stoupe Beck.

After Stoupe Beck I could see Ravenscar brooding on the hill ahead of me and it seemed so close but no matter how much I ran it wasn’t getting any closer.  I slowed to a walk a lot more often than I would have liked but was pushing on as hard as I could, every time I checked my Garmin I could see that time was slipping away from me, to make matters worse the sun was starting to go down.  Thoughts of a DNF at Ravenscar began to engulf me, instead of dragging me down it seemed to galvanise me, I ran on repeating “I HAVE NOT COME THIS F***ING FAR TO F***ING DNF HERE!!!” I had even taken my earphones out to make sure i heard my message to myself (but also because I’d gone through every single track on my MP3 and it was an hour into the loop again).  As Ravenscar got closer I realised that the climb into the village was going to be savage and was about to get downhearted when just a few metres in front of me a deer bounded over a fence and across my path.  It was breathtaking, the stealth and grace of the animal and it spurred me on further.

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As I started the wooded climb into Ravenscar, it began to get dark and I was forced to get out my torch for the evil, horrid, miserable climb into the village.  While climbing I realised I hadn’t eaten in what seemed like ages and this might have been contributing to my mood, I totally stuffed the last of my jelly babies down my neck and began looking forward to the wine gums I had waiting for me at Ravenscar.  I had already realised that yet again I had too much food in my drop bag so on the run into CP I began to plan what I’d leave behind at the CP for anyone behind me to have if they wanted and what I was keeping.

I made it to the CP with about half an hour to spare, I was elated and high as a kite.  I ran in gibbering on, every other word was an effword and asked for a cup of tea with as much sugar as they could spoon into it while I sorted my dropbag out, swapped my MP3 players, attached my torches to my belt kit and put my head torch on.  I binned all my sandwiches, left my crisps, Bombay Mix and some gels on the table while taking on more coke into the belt bottles, necking two cups of coke and a cup of orange juice, a Lucozade caffeine shot and planning to run on with a few gels in my bag, a Snickers in my hand, a Red Bull in the other.  I finished my tea and left the CP running much to the amazement of the marshalls.

I was on a pitch black tarmac road but knew the task was 10 miles in 3 hours and needed to make the best of the flat ground.  At this point I did give some minor thought to the fact that I probably should have at least put on my base layer but I genuinely believed that I was warm from running and the arm warmers would keep the worst chill off me. After about 800 metres my head torch began to flicker and die.  I knew the batteries were fresh so I came it a thump and it became bright for a few seconds before flickering and dimming.  I switched it to red and twisted it onto the back of my head as a warning to cars and if lucky any runners (I knew from the CP that there were a few still behind me) or sweepers following on.  I grabbed my first spare torch hugely glad that I was paranoid enough to bring two spares (and had just joked about overkill at the CP) and jogged on.  Almost before the turn into the field I came across another runner who was making his way back to the CP after deciding to DNF.  I thought about trying to persuade him to continue with me for company but before the words were out of my mouth he told me his legs were shot.  I wished him luck and pressed on hard knowing that a good chunk of this section was runnable.

Not wanting to do too much damage to my legs and energy reserves I settled into a 5 minute run, 2 minute walk pattern with eating taking place every 15 minutes.  For the first time during the race I switched my Garmin so that heart rate was hidden and I could see distance covered knowing that Scarborough was around the 83km mark.  As I ran along the top of Beast Cliff i could see the bright lights in the distance and got a fantastic view of the promised fireworks display, I felt very confident to be rattling along at a decent pace despite the pain and darkness.

I felt I was going really well until, inevitably I hit yet another set of steps, typically for this coastline these weren’t proper steps but merely a hillside with which rocks made smooth by years of water erosion had been peppered close enough and at different heights enough to allow some sort of foothold.  At some point someone had place handrails alongside these to assist walkers.  In daylight they’re passable with care, at night having been moving for 13 hours treacherous is probably a little tame.  This time I descended into Hayburn Wyke (I was actually sick of seeing the name Wyke on the map and knew that I had Cloughton Wyke to come too).

After what seemed like an eternity of descending I was in a black hole surrounded on 3 sides by cliffs and the sea to my left.  I looked up to see a perfectly clear sky devoid of man-made light but full of a beautiful starscape.  I gazed in awe for a few seconds before cracking on up the “steps” at the other side. After Heyburn Wyke, in my mind I was still jogging along the clifftop but Garmin data begs to differ and what I thought was a jog was most definitely a walk, not even a fast walk but a plod.

I arrived at Cloughton Wyke and yet more painful down and up steps, with my knee now screaming at me that enough was enough.  I resorted to Jens Voigts “SHUT UP LEGS!” mantra and again yanked out my earphones to make sure i could hear my message. Back on the clifftop I bumbled my way along seemingly jogging but I looked down at my Garmin and realised how slow I was actually moving.  I looked right and saw lights from some clifftop dwellings and begun to wonder how well someone knocking on the door after 10pm would be treated.  I pushed the thoughts aside and pressed on trying again to get a jog on.

The path took me past an electric pylon and some sort of clifftop building before bearing right again.  I passed a clifftop bench, then another.  A voice in my head said I should sit down on the next one.  As I got to the next one the voice in my head was urging me to have a lie down for a few minutes. I slapped myself mentally and kept going. About 200 metres further on the sight of another hand rail came into view, I was truly devastated.

After the first couple of steps it was obvious I couldn’t walk down them so I sat down and bumped down them like a small child.  At the bottom step I found a signpost that told me Scarborough was still 3 miles away.  I checked my watch, the cut off was in 30 minutes, there was no way I’d make the cut off, my eyes welled up, I’d completely f***ed it up.

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I looked at the other side of the sign and saw that it pointed to Burniston 1 mile away.  After a moments thought and consulting the map it appeared I had a choice between getting to Burniston and a warm pub for a pick up or bumbling along clifftops in the hope of reaching Scarborough for a DNF anyway.

In my head I knew it was over. I dug my phone out and first of all text Natalie to let her know what I was doing then rang race control. Shirley answered and I explained where I was, that I was going to miss the cut off and I thought I should retire.  She was great, she told me I wasn’t last, if I wanted to I could push on to Scarborough but I knew I couldn’t get that far, in the background I heard Jon’s voice “Tell him to stop moaning and start running!”

Jon then took over the call and I explained how I was and we decided that I was going to retire.  I told him I would head for Burniston and find somewhere warm then ring him to let him know where while he arranged a pickup.

Dejected I began to walk to Burniston, my phone rang and I answered.  It was my wife Natalie and my 2 year old daughter Martha, I couldn’t really understand much of it because it was windy, I was in a state and couldn’t translate 2 year old speak at that point but emotionally I got the message and cracked on walking to Burniston.

I arrived at the village at around 11pm and asked a local for directions to the nearest pub that was open, he informed me to follow my ears to the Three Jolly Sailors where there was a band on which I did and called Race Control from the beer garden unable to go inside and face happy drunks.

Within 10 minutes I was inside Jon’s car and heading back to Filey via Scarborough where Jon stopped to help some marshalls/sweepers get their car started. Once back at Race HQ Shirley told me I was shivering and from nowhere a marshall appeared with a warm jacket and I was offered a sleeping bag and told to lie down.

So many amazing people at Race HQ looked after me, brought me hot drinks and food and chatted with me while I pulled round I can’t even remember who they are but really, I am eternally grateful.

After a short while I was privileged to see Andrea finish, followed shortly by Dee and Jo.  With a smile back on my face I congratulated them, got every item of clothing from my kit bag on and headed back to my car for the journey back to the caravan.

Having had a few days to mull things over and review the day in my mind I’ve decided that inexperience was probably my biggest enemy on the day.

Abstaining from caffeine was probably a huge mistake in the days before and having my heart rate erratic and high for around 15 miles could not have been good. When I took a wrong turn on Hummersea Cliff I also panicked and expended a lot of energy unnecessarily trying to find other runners instead of keeping a sensible pace. In terms of kit, I carried way too much food and as a result too much weight for long periods of the day.  I would have been far better off with a few gels plus the contents of my “Sweat and Slavery” bags. I should have been more cautious in the use of the electrolyte mix and had a choice of different drinks in my belt bottles.

Things that went well:

Nothing chafed, seriously all the BodyGlide and taping was worth it. I got only 1 blister, all the other pains in my feet were hot spots but I only had 1 blister (an evil one on my left little toe) so I call that a success too. I was clearly fit enough to run over 60 miles, just that I handicapped myself with poor pacing, fuelling inefficiently and additional weight.

The big thing that let me down was the lapse at Ravenscar, I should never have left that CP without layering up for the night.  Even now I have no idea what I was thinking but it’s evident from the way things ended that I had a close brush with hypothermia as a result of that decision.

All in all I really enjoyed the race, I want to have another crack at it but most of all I realise that races like this are only a success because of the professionalism of organisers like Jon and Shirley and their team of volunteer marshalls and sweepers who do a fabulous job of looking after runners and understand that at times they stop being capable of doing things themselves and automatically just do stuff for them.

Cheers – I WILL be back!